A father of many children - how to lay the foundation of family happiness and raise children on a personal example

Still planning to create a family, Gomel residents Maxim and Vera Raduntsev decided that they would live in their home and raise at least three children. During Parental Love Week, we visited them, felt the atmosphere of warmth and comfort, and also learned how dreams became a reality and why the head of the family believes that the father’s mission is a story that unfolds throughout life.

Maxim Raduntsev with his wife Vera and sons Maxim, Dmitry and the younger Alexei. The early childhood of 43-year-old Maxim Gennadyevich passed in a small village of gold miners in Yakutia, where his parents moved after the Chernobyl accident. Despite the harsh climate, he remembers those years with warmth:

- Even cold winters we, boys, were useless - frolic in snowdrifts, which piled above height. And most importantly, we were surrounded by hospitable, hardworking and very responsive people who were ready to help in any situation.

A large role in the formation of his character was played by his mother, a master of sports in mountaineering, who worked as a physical education teacher and coached children in the section. Together with them, he joined the sport and his son, who to this day begins the morning with pull-ups on the crossbar.

In the early 1990s, the family returned to Gomel. After school, the guy received secondary special education at the Higher Professional School of Mechanical Engineering (now the Automechanical College). Later he graduated from the Gomel State Technical University named after P. O. Sukhoi with a diploma of an engineer in the design of agricultural machinery. From the sanatorium to the registry office, Maxim’s labor biography is closely connected with Gomselmash OJSC, where he went from a repairman to the head of the railway shop. Thanks to the enterprise, he met his betrothed wife Vera, who works here as a software engineer for the information technology management. The meeting took place almost 22 years ago in the walls of the sanatorium "Machinobuilder", where both rested on trade union vouchers. First, they settled in rooms on one floor, and at the evening disco Maxim decided to approach a pretty neighbor. “Resort-production novel” grew into a strong relationship that led to the registry office. By the way, the sanatorium that played a fateful role remains a favorite place now for family holidays.

Even before the wedding, the couple started a large-scale project, which became a good test for the strength of feelings and the seriousness of further intentions. In the private sector of the Soviet district purchased a dilapidated house with a plot. Having begun the capital reconstruction, conducted communications, made an extension and a residential attic floor. In general, having made a titanic effort, built a home. In order to reduce costs as much as possible, Maxim performed almost all the works independently:

- From the foundation to the skate - all with their own hands. I've mastered so many specialties that you can already go to construction. Only the crusts are left to get. "A father is forever." The fact that there will be many children in the family, Maxim and Vera agreed immediately. Born in 2010, the first child was named after his father:

- The news that I became a father, and that time and the next two received in the workplace. Therefore, even these fond memories I associate with Gomselmash. The wife called, "You have a son!" I am not a very emotional person by nature: I exhaled with relief that the birth had gone well, I was glad and returned to work. But when a lump in diapers was taken from the hospital, the heart in the chest, of course, echoed. I do not remember any difficulties of the initial period. Probably because when I was a teenager, I was babysitting a brother who was nine years younger than me. So I already knew how to hold, feed and even swaddle the baby. But the full awareness of fatherhood, its role in the fate of children comes gradually, revealing over time with reference to various stages and events in the life of our family. Something is happening right now, and something I have yet to learn. Now 16-year-old Maxim Maxim Maximovich is studying at college, mastering a set of working specialties. About his participation in the professional choice of his son Raduntsev-senior tells with a smile:

Maxim immediately said: “I want to become a welder!” I tried to convince him - constantly in tarpaulin, noise, flashes, a specific smell. Like, maybe you'll think again? No son. Okay. I brought a welding machine from my home workshop, turned it on, showed me how to cook – I say, try it! I was hoping Maxim wouldn't like it and he'd change his mind. And he was carried away - the holder did not let go! Then he took off his mask and said, “I’ll be a welder.” I didn’t mind, my son made a choice. I know stories when children study on the orders of their parents. Years will be spent, then they bring a diploma – hold it, and now I’m going to become what I want. Or they regret their whole lives that they were not allowed to fulfill their dreams. That's not gonna happen in our family. Dad can do anything! In addition to studying, Maxim is engaged in sports climbing, takes prizes at competitions. As the eldest of the brothers, he is short-spoken and the most prudent. 12-year-old Dima is slightly shy. But eight-year-old Lesha is an inexhaustible fountain of energy. He works in a dance group, where he has many girlfriends, and in a robotics club. It's all serious. The spaceport and tank are already assembled, the Terminator and Robocop are in production plans. However, Alexey is worried about the survivability of future products:

- As long as they don't fall to the floor and fall apart.

- Has this happened? - I am involuntarily imbued with the experiences of the designer.

- It was. About once. Maybe two. Or three.

When asked to tell about his father, Lesha gives a brief description:

- My dad's great! He can do anything.

The flattering assessment has documentary evidence.

At one of the city competitions "Superpope" Maxim Raduntsev became the winner in the nomination "The Most Creative Dad". And at the contest “Happy together” the family was awarded the prize of audience sympathy. Disagreements and even jokes between brothers sometimes happen. At such moments, the middle and youngest instantly become allies in order to more effectively prove their rightness to the elder. But it is much more common to join forces to perform parental errands, such as cleaning the house. Each of the children has their own plots. For example, Alexei likes to wash the stairs to the second floor. Hearing this, Lesha distracts from tea and cake and clarifies:

- I like running on it more!

And recently, acting as a united labor front, the family conducted a successful operation on the backyard. The technical process and logistics were adjusted no worse than the factory. While the younger brothers were picking apples, the father cut them and drove them through the juicer, the mother boiled and rolled the juice, and the eldest son dragged cans. As a result, more than 100 liters of natural drink were prepared. Looking at how everything is arranged in the small world of the Raduntsevs, you understand the main thing: to lay a model of healthy relationships, instill a sense of responsibility and care for loved ones can be easier in families with many children. Than where the child is alone and willy-nilly, sometimes unconsciously, everything revolves around him.

Confirming these findings, Maxim Raduntsev summarizes:

- We love and educate all children equally. We teach to work, to the fact that money does not fall for nothing – they always need to be earned. We try to be honest and instill in our sons universal moral values, and this can only be done by personal example. No father will convince a child that smoking is harmful, while shaking the ashes from a cigarette in a can. And even the promise “I’ll find out – I’ll wash my neck” will not help. Together with my wife, we want our children to grow up to be good, decent people, worthy citizens and patriots of Belarus. That, I think, is our most important parenting role.

prolesk@sb.by